Do I have to remind you of the tough battles we fought to get here? For decades, we were treated like second class citizens in this country. We were told that some people were born to rule forever, while we were to remain subservient. We prayed, we planned and we plotted. Today, by divine intervention we have reached the top. They tried to stop us. They said it was not our time. They said the position had to go back to them. But we came together and gave a resounding no. So they are not happy. They are now blaming our brother for all the problems in the country. But we cannot allow that to happen. We must protect him. He is our brother.
Friends, that is the message I have been asked to pass to you. We must develop strategies to shield our brother. When they say this government is corrupt, ask them, did our brother invent corruption? How many billions were stolen before our brother came to office? And by the way, did he ever promise to fight corruption in his manifesto? When it suits them, they say government is corrupt, but did they not steal money too? We must never forget to hit back when they say his government is corrupt. He is our brother.
Ladies and gentlemen, one of the most ridiculous things I hear people say today is that this government has no vision and mission. I laugh. In all the years they were in charge, tell me where was their own vision? And assuming they had one, where did it lead us? For how many years were we the laughing stock of the whole world? For 50 years, we had all kinds of charlatans in power leading us in circles of poverty and underdevelopment. They were not accused of lack of vision. Simply because one of us is there today, they are saying this government has no strategy to face our numerous challenges. Just ignore them; he is our brother.
Everyone is now saying this country is highly polarized between Muslim and Christian and between north and south. They accuse our brother of employing divide and rule tactics. Tell them: why not? Inform them that we were already divided. But what if he used divide and rule; is he the first? When they were in power, did they not use all sorts of shenanigans to divide us too? We all know what they did. They used the instruments of state and our very resources to create all sorts of divisions and schisms to ensure that we never spoke with one voice. Today, because we have learnt from them and used the same methods more effectively than they did, all kinds of accusations are flying. Forget about them. He is our brother.
They keep repeating that unemployment is a major issue that must be tackled and that government has no direction on what to do. So what? Did he create the problem? Was it not there before divine intervention gave him victory? For all the number of years they were in charge, ask them how many million jobs they created. Yes, bring out biros and papers and demand facts and figures. Ask them to give you the number of jobs they created. That will keep them quiet. And when they keep quiet, put it back to them: how do they expect him to create millions of jobs simply by waving a magic wand? Remember, he is our brother.
When it comes to the issue of power supply, the answer is very simple. Were we not living in darkness before he came to office? How many megawatts were we producing before he got there? You must remind them that when they were there, if they had built more power stations, we would not be where we are today. So even if he begins the construction of power stations today, it may take some years before we see the gains. Hopefully, he will still be there to enjoy the fruits of his labour. He is our brother.
My friends, the most dangerous ploy they have developed is to ask whether you - as a person - have benefited from his, or his party's largesse. They will scare you by saying all of us will suffer hardship and poverty from his incompetence and ineptitude. Tell them it doesn't matter. We also suffered under them. Insult them; call them names and distort the issues, but whatever you do - in person or on the Internet - protect, defend and shield him. He is our brother.
Friends, that is the message I have been asked to pass to you. We must develop strategies to shield our brother. When they say this government is corrupt, ask them, did our brother invent corruption? How many billions were stolen before our brother came to office? And by the way, did he ever promise to fight corruption in his manifesto? When it suits them, they say government is corrupt, but did they not steal money too? We must never forget to hit back when they say his government is corrupt. He is our brother.
Ladies and gentlemen, one of the most ridiculous things I hear people say today is that this government has no vision and mission. I laugh. In all the years they were in charge, tell me where was their own vision? And assuming they had one, where did it lead us? For how many years were we the laughing stock of the whole world? For 50 years, we had all kinds of charlatans in power leading us in circles of poverty and underdevelopment. They were not accused of lack of vision. Simply because one of us is there today, they are saying this government has no strategy to face our numerous challenges. Just ignore them; he is our brother.
Everyone is now saying this country is highly polarized between Muslim and Christian and between north and south. They accuse our brother of employing divide and rule tactics. Tell them: why not? Inform them that we were already divided. But what if he used divide and rule; is he the first? When they were in power, did they not use all sorts of shenanigans to divide us too? We all know what they did. They used the instruments of state and our very resources to create all sorts of divisions and schisms to ensure that we never spoke with one voice. Today, because we have learnt from them and used the same methods more effectively than they did, all kinds of accusations are flying. Forget about them. He is our brother.
They keep repeating that unemployment is a major issue that must be tackled and that government has no direction on what to do. So what? Did he create the problem? Was it not there before divine intervention gave him victory? For all the number of years they were in charge, ask them how many million jobs they created. Yes, bring out biros and papers and demand facts and figures. Ask them to give you the number of jobs they created. That will keep them quiet. And when they keep quiet, put it back to them: how do they expect him to create millions of jobs simply by waving a magic wand? Remember, he is our brother.
When it comes to the issue of power supply, the answer is very simple. Were we not living in darkness before he came to office? How many megawatts were we producing before he got there? You must remind them that when they were there, if they had built more power stations, we would not be where we are today. So even if he begins the construction of power stations today, it may take some years before we see the gains. Hopefully, he will still be there to enjoy the fruits of his labour. He is our brother.
My friends, the most dangerous ploy they have developed is to ask whether you - as a person - have benefited from his, or his party's largesse. They will scare you by saying all of us will suffer hardship and poverty from his incompetence and ineptitude. Tell them it doesn't matter. We also suffered under them. Insult them; call them names and distort the issues, but whatever you do - in person or on the Internet - protect, defend and shield him. He is our brother.
ANOTHER EXCELLENT SATARICAL PIECE FROM MY DEAR BROTHER AND COLLEAGUE. WELLDONE!
ReplyDelete